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A story of hope, love, and redemption.
I remember many years ago as a young father, a young husband and a young minister how excited I was for the opportunity to make an impact in the world, particularly in our church and community. I was so grateful for this invitation to grow in my ability to love, serve and lead people well.
I remember many years ago as a young father, a young husband and a young minister how excited I was for the opportunity to make an impact in the world, particularly in our church and community. I was so grateful for this invitation to grow in my ability to love, serve and lead people well.
Even though I was very excited about this, I was also extremely concerned about one major thing, and that was neglecting my family.
I was concerned because of the examples that I saw in front of me. I discovered just how common it was to see men who were very powerful, charismatic, and exceptional leaders, who at the same time had terrible family lives. Some had been in and out of multiple marriages, and others had kids that didn’t want anything to do with them, due to their neglect and lack of connection to their hearts.
“To be an effective and influential leader, you had to sacrifice your family on the altar of success.”
I was terrified of the thought of losing my wife due to my neglect, and I was very concerned about raising PK's!
Although that message was loud and clear, it definitely didn't resonate with me, because I instinctively knew that there was a better way. I just didn't know how to discover that better way.
I didn't want my wife to give up on our marriage or leave me because she had grown weary.
Feeling like she was always in second place to my “marriage” and first commitment to the ministry. Nor did I want to raise kids who would grow up to hate God, reject the church, and despise their own dad due to my neglect of them.
it was truly a deep concern that I had, because I was very much aware of my propensity to be overly focused on the ministry and the incredible opportunity I was given to impact lives.
At that time, I began to passionately cry out to the Lord
sharing with him my deep concern. It was then that he invited me to go on a journey With Him.
His invitation came in the form of two questions that he asked one morning while I was getting ready for work. The first question was,
“He was a powerful man of God who healed the sick, raised the dead, and led millions to the Lord!”
I truly thought He would be very impressed with that answer, and I was eagerly anticipating a “well done, my son!” Or “that’s my boy!” from Him, but neither of those statements ever came back to me. Instead, he asked me another question which was mixed with a suggestion:
He said,
“How about this: his family were his greatest fans?“
When the Lord asked me this question, I immediately knew what he was and wasn’t saying. He wasn’t saying “no son, don’t go after that which I put in your heart. Go after your family instead!“
What he was saying was, “let me show you how to have both. Let me show you how to go after everything that I’ve placed in your heart…while taking your family with you on that journey.“
That was the beginning of a 20+ year adventure of me following Jesus and learning from Him how to grow and develop as a leader, and how to love, serve, and lead people well, while at the same time being intentional with my love, service, care, and connection with the hearts of my wife and kids.
As a result of that incredible journey, of which I am still on, I have shifted mindsets, gained tools, and developed habits that have empowered me to not only continue to grow as an influential and effective leader, but I also have an incredible relationship with my six adult children and I am still enjoying a passionate and very fulfilling marriage of 32 years with my most favorite person on the planet.
And now I have the incredible privilege of inviting men to travel this journey with me…
Take 'Em With Me is the journey of becoming an exceptional husband; one who chooses to go after everything that God has placed in his heart…while taking his family with him on that Journey!
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